funny responses to what are you doing this weekend

I dont know? It can be so hard to set boundaries with the inlaws! I dont feeling hes hitting on me exactly, though I am not answering in a way he likes/expects (am I supposed to be chatty bc Im young-ish and female? I think it would be odd to preemptively take that away. But in the age of smart phones I also find Im going to have to check my email before I say yes to that, so let me get back to you helpful. But its also true I can (usually) reorganize my schedule enough to accommodate plans I want to attend. ME: Great! Thats fair. This will not go away. Was he not getting back to her soon enough? I also see are you free Saturday? or What are you doing tonight? as potential traps and in part its because in college the manager of the dining hall I worked at would call, start with What are you doing tonight? and then argue that whatever I said was less important than covering a shift for someone. New day, old me, just doing routine stuff. Sometimes I go with something like, Im already committed to a couple of things, but they still have to get back to me about when, exactly, theyre happening. Thats just how some people ask I suppose. Good enough. Me:why? Men who constantly try to manipulate women into doing all their emotional labor is a ridiculously huge problem in American culture right now. I think part of it, too, is that I have mental health issues and physical issues so sometimes the questions make me feel pressured to have a good weekend. I've Tried, but No One Listens Hopefully Not as Good as I'll Ever Be If I Was Any Better, Vitamins Would Be Taking Me Okay. I disagree concerning the Where are you from? part. To me, thats pretty manipulative and when its done I generally conclude that its done on purpose. And my mom thought I was like the most studious kid ever, because I knew that if I ever looked like I had free time, she would fill it with chores, so I always had some kind of project to work on (I did have the grades to back this up or it wouldnt have worked). If you want to invite them, INVITE. I get the feeling Im not alone, I always thought my relationship with my parents was healthy until I became an adult and now I dread conversations with them. If you both talk about what to do in the garden (I know you probably dont own one, its an example), is it a conversation like I want to plant radishes Well, I want to plant flowers Fine, then we plant one half with flowers of your choice and one half with radishes and everyone waters everything? That's it, nothing extra. Yeah, I definitely use this question as way to be polite. I dislike being asked this question too, except in my case its more that I dont want to be asked this question by coworkers, ever. Im sure its benignly intended but its intrusive. I really appreciate that, even though my parents and I had conflict, they never threatened to kick me out if I couldnt pay the rent. Yeah, my parents did that too. But yeah. Then, actually do check your calendar, check in with yourself if you actually want to do whatever it is, and answer the person when its convenient for you. Must say I kinda love your kids response. I think you nailed it with that last bit, to an epic degree. And when they do, you need to be prepared with the most appropriate reply to make the most of the situation. I felt really connected to LW upon reading the letter! Lets do it.). But when its a thing I -did- want to go to, its 100% better to ensure that I have made plans for the actual event and not have to deal with last minute changes due to someones mistake or mishearing. I think my own culture is more ask-y, but I had a pretty pushover personality and often felt, well, pushed around by the people around me. as much as it is practicing not giving into pressure to give an explanation of your schedule OR an immediate answer. I can find someone else, so dont worry if youd rather not-Mittens likes you, so I thought of you first, but I know at least two people who have been angling for some alone time with the fountain., Translation: Here are all the ridiculous things I am asking for, and the dubious rewards I can offer in exchange. Then you can do x with/for me! just blatantly assuming that if you are free, then you will obviously want to do this thing. If they want to tell you about their job, they can. Im sure to him thats bewildering, but to me its bewildering that for so long he simply refused to choose to behave with appropriate respect. When I tell you Ill be meal planning this weekend thats not an invitation for you to tell me all of your diet ideas and which meals are healthier. Also, if you want people to drop the polite social conventions and be direct with youmaybe try directly telling them this? Ah. (Like just because I have no plans, I must do the Thing she wants to do. So I got in the habit of saying, I have no plans and thats just the way I like it. At the very least, it makes you feel like the place you live isnt really your homethat youll never belong or be from there, that you have no claim to it. Everyone knows most people mean it well, its small talk, etc but these things ARE not nice to be the receiver of. Ive now got a standard policy of dont know, Ill have to check my calendar and get back to you. I hear you. It is handy because it has a friendly tone of I dont want to go into detail while still participating in the conversation. I would actually be pretty weirded out by a friend who a) felt this was genuinely intrusive BUT b) also would not actually tell me they felt this was too intrusive. I find myself physically unable of disturbing her. If I catch myself, before they respond lll clarify what my actual invitation is. Humor is one of the best ways to respond to being asked out, as long as it's well-received. This is true, but it will almost certainly come with a cost. Cousin Charles is having a party, and I think it would be good if you showed up.. Its totally true that you can opt out of those things. Plus they have the freedom to say Nah, cant on Saturday, but Im free Friday or whatever. But you, yours steals the show every time. There are a couple of questions my Mother asks that trigger a Pavlovian eye-roll from me because I know they are invariably followed by a request for a favor, to the point where if someone else asks me the same question in a totally innocuous way, I still react to it. A: Thanks, you too. Which brings me right back to not understanding why parents do this to themselves and their children. Im well aware of that risk. In the case of friends and dates, I feel like sometimes its a slightly manipulative way of getting me to do the actual asking / planning. 26+ Funny Responses to Being Asked on a Date (Replying Yes or No) Im thinking the letter we had a while back with mandatory no premade food potlucks is a glaring example of a culture that needs changed, but I would also like to see room in the workplace for people who are good at their work but are reserved/private/not interested in relationships with their coworkers outside of work. Yes, this. Why, whatve you got? with a tone implying that weekends are always full of important adulting chores that I really dont want to do, but adults gotta adult, you know? And then when you part somebody accidentally says love you, too. Thats how it always happens for me, anyway. Thank you. If anyone else runs into this, Im not free on Saturday, so Ill see you some other time! is a perfectly polite and respectful response. One of the costs of challenging social rules is that it makes it harder for people to learn them. If you have people in your life who you trust not to get offended at this exchange, definitely give this method a try. This is OT, but if someone would like to explain how its supposed to work in the US, Id appreciate it. If you dont want to do something tell them youre not allowed and your parents are really strict etc. But people should take turns is different from someone else should always go first (or for gendered/other status reasons, I should always go first). Just make sure to follow these three rules for sending Tinder messages: Keep it PG-13, even on Tinder. People here may be disagreeing that it should be a normal social rule, but if you change your behavior to meet that, youll be wrong by other standards. friend: yooooooooo goodyou I have other plans. But if you just asked me if I have plans and I just admitted that I dont, then yeah, it can look pretty rude or hurtful if you invite me to something and I have to decline. I am a Guess person, and that is not going to change (and I often feel annoyed at people who seem to think that it shouldmy brain wiring is okay, too! How To Answer "What Do You Do For Fun?" (With Examples) Published on August 6, 2022. The fact that LW is this bugged about it shows theres a problem and the parent is being manipulative. As in, What are you doing? is another way of asking What are your hobbies?. If they mean well then they will try to stop when you explain that you prefer to be asked directly. Like Sounds great but tonight wouldnt work for me or Yknow what, Im pretty tired, I could have made something shorter work but that play will just be too much or just Hm, nah. But if her idea is super cool or needs to be done on a certain date, Ill absolutely shelve my TV watching for another night! Published April 10, 2020 "How are you doing right now?" That's the question I've been defaulting to on the phone, over text, and over Zoom chats during this time of ballooning,. It's to funny for everybody. "Yes, the weekend always . He doesnt need to be that nosy about how you spend your time. or are you busy?). How to Reply to Online Dating Messages the Right Way But a couple people have African-violeted me over this. Him: Nothing fun? Another interesting look at how varied cultural/regional norms and peoples own experiences can be. Ill do it anyway, but saying it that way doesnt make it somehow not an order, Mom! Nah, Why do you ask is generally pretty safe to take literally. Thats my go-to when someone asks me what I am doing at some point in the near future. Thats just the question it looks like. Enter your email address to follow this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email. :) Hope you like our compilation and try to stay serious ,please . I dont give any indication as to what I am up to until they tell me what they are up to. Eventually I got consistent work as a freelancer, something I could do from home even when I was in pain or needed oxygen etc. At least once I figured out that they genuinely *didnt* need to know anything about me if they were going to behave that way I could default to oh my god Im so busy! Maybe you have a mountain of laundry and it takes the whole weekend, or you are just doing the laundry inbetween other activities. I wish that just once I had the wherewithal to respond to a manipulative invitation like LW describes with the classic Phoebe Buffet line: Oh, I wish I could, but I dont want to.. I say nothing much and the other person responds, yeah, its nice to be lazy sometimes, right? And I dont want to get into how no, its not lazy to need time to recuperate and our society puts too much pressure on needing to be constantly productive and not respect ourselves as people. "It's Friday baby!! (Wriggle your hips) I am as happy as a tick on a big, fat doggy. Theres just no way, you see, that this is what a womans mind does, what she is for. 25 of the Best Responses to "How Was You Weekend" - Tosaylib My introvert self doesnt like last-minute extroverting.). If I say why and she responds with something easily done another time or only sort of appealing, Ill judge it against a nice evening of doing nothing and maybe pass. That might be some of what LW is sensing in terms of it seems like you want to ask me but youre afraid: maybe for them, saying I would like to do X this weekend, can you come? is an invitation THEY would have a hard time refusing even if they didnt want to do it. We do this so thoroughly that we then have to figure out how to re-train them so this doesnt put them at greater risk in the presence of predators, and we dont do that re-training thoroughly enough. I make a special point to not do that, not even if the thing Im asking for help with is sort of non-negotiable. That sounds weird coming from you. !" 6) "Come back here weekend!! For those who are ready to stand out from the crowd, we've gathered ten hilarious out of office messages that will inspire you to raise the bar the next time you sit down to write an autoresponder. Nothing much? and Im like yup! As a lot of commenters have pointed out what are you doing this weekend can be asked in a variety of contexts with a variety of motives BUT one thing that has tended to work well for me is to just pick one thing Im to talk about without mentioning when it is: Im looking forward to my birdwatching class! or Partner and I are going on a hike! and then asking about their weekend. Anything fun planned? If the other person isnt in a chatty mood, we go comfortably silent after a few pleasantries because the Small Talk Gods have been appeased. Absolutely! If you follow through with people you actually want to see (as in, Can I let you know tomorrow? = You actually let them know one way or another tomorrow), you arent being a jerk by not responding immediately to their questions or invitations, and you dont owe a full accounting of your time. A playful Why, whats up? is cool, but I am probably not compatible friends with someone whose response to a polite-small-talk/soft-invite-opening is to demand why I am asking such a nosy question. 3. FRIEND: I am available [date]! If they really are trying to manipulate you then Im afraid having just the right words wont fix it you will probably have to say no directly when they finally get to their request. When we nearly got evicted from our housing situation, I was critically busy trying to find an apartment for me and the housemates, and it kind of annoyed me to have friends pinging me like Heyyy, I miss you, can we get lunch this week, without finding out if I was actually available first. I think there is something to be said for family relationships between adults where the balance is between emotional labor and responsibility for the home rather than money. Are you willing? or, if Im feeling that Im entitled to demand it, Ill say, are you available? (example: Im not going to react well if you want to play Minecraft instead of helping me wrap the favors for grandpas birthday dinner; if youre getting together with friends, online or IRL, or doing homework, OK). So when I get a what are you doing after work Friday? text halfway through work on Thursday just tell me what youre going to suggest in the same message. Sometimes I feel like this is just another Hi, how are you? kind of question that can be sort of skipped over. Also, I dont expect that the LW is bothered by every person who casually asks this question; Im sure they can tell when someone is just making chit chat vs someone who is interested in spending time together. Oh thanks capn for the hilarious answers!!! Nothing obviously inappropriate has happened, I dont think I need to talk to his supervisor (I dont want him fired, it would just be nice if hed back off on his own, but IDK if that will happen, or maybe he will transfer or change hours (I thought he had for a few months last year when I did not see him at all)). Spares you from having to say Great and feel like youre lying (which can be uncomfortable even when you *are* aware youre participating in a defined social ritual), but also averts the worry that if you say things are bad, the asker will pry for more details. Funny Responses To What Are You Doing Actively waiting for my problems to go away. We all had too much to drink and passed out at Dan's house!" He sometimes vocally wonders why other teams and departments will go out of their way to help me with things but not him, and its because I respond to their small talk rather than shutting it down and gently rebuff social overtures rather than saying No, I dont want to get to know you better or similar. Teaching my fish how to swim. It kind of sucks to be going about your business and then people remind you that you dont fit in. I used this to train my mom to use text/email instead, because 1) I hate phone and 2) a written message means much less chances of either one of us getting the details wrong. Sometimes people respond in a very vague way (oh just some family stuff), which will tell me that its private or they just dont want to discuss it with me and Ill drop it and switch topics. All of these situation have the same question in them, but they are not remotely all one situation. There are some funny responses to "what are you going to do with your life" for when your family keeps asking you the same dull questions. +1, Im the same way. Ok so Ive been wanting to go to this play, I was thinking of going to the Friday night show or the Saturday matinee, would you be interested in one of those dates?. But more often we talk about their kids or grandkids or the cute hat theyre wearing or the wedding theyre shopping for. Thank you!!! If it doesnt work with my schedule, I will tell you. I have a feeling my check liver light will come on this weekend. No way. Am I supposed to answer? A lot of the people old enough to have adult children at this point still put phone communication on some kind of pinnacle in their minds, because thats what they grew up with. "Spend some time this weekend on home improvement. Here's the most obvious answer that no one can argue with. (Say it like he or she is complimenting you even though he or she is not.) Figuring out how my plans fit together is my problem, not anyone elses. It means people will help you less, go out of their way for you less, give you poorer recommendations for your next job, and on and on. Ive seen too many nightmare scenarios of late, in the wake of the Aziz Ansari mess, that start out exactly like you are describing. And so if it happens to me, I wind up agreeing to the thing even if maybe I normally wouldnt have, because now I have no valid excuse for declining. And genuinely interested in what theyre doing! What are you doing Saturday? might be an attempt to be extra polite about making an invitation, but it only works if the person wants to accept, and its only necessary if the person is too shy to say no. Since LW was talking about very short-term questions, I certainly hope no one is asking because they need to tell the caterer! Point 1 also notes that LW apparently finds the small-talk aspect unusually invasive ze doesnt wish to share zir plans at all, while many people consider this to be a low-stakes social bonding ritual. Those non-negotiable things come up probably twice a month, at most. Most of those projects and research were for fanfiction. Its okay that my body needs time to recuperate. LW is pretty clearly not talking so much about people making casual small talk as people being roundabout manipulative. "Continue breathing." BTW, the most usual response to that last exchange is, "Works for me!" Depending upon the sophistication of the inquisitor, the final line may be "Continued respiration." Sponsored by Interview Success Formula Job interview secrets revealed. 126 followers. I should have specified that this particular woman was white, of a european background, and when she elaborated it was pretty clear that she was getting the I am genuinely curious about you variety of the question and not the You arent REALLY one of us implication. Depending on the purpose of the encounter, that might mark the end of the interaction or serve as an agreed-upon signal for one or the other or both parties to end the dance of content-free niceties and get to the point or commence the conducting of shared business. 7 Tricky Work Situations, and How to Respond to Them 30 Best Replies To "What's Up?" (Funny & Friendly) The lines of dominance and power are what make this a problem. I recognize that the question can DEFINITELY be used to intentionally or unconsciously other people, Her problem with it seemed more about having to answer it ALL the time than any implied racism or xenophobia. So the reframing may help. Ive heard its a very Southern California thing and that people from other places are annoyed by it. I like why do you ask? as a pre-programmed autoresponse, because it leaves room for them to stay, just wondering if you have fun plans, or making conversation.. That being said, in a couple of guys Ive dated in the last few years, Ive been amazed at how fast and how almost without me noticing they can go from planning and executing dates very well to somehow only being able to function if Im doing it. I had a hard time staying employed and taking care of myself because I have a chronic illness, and the alternative to living with my parents would be to figure out how to apply for section 8 housing and Disability, both of which have a long wait list. Also, the teachers here will not do your homework for you. If it is in fact a lead up to an invitation or request I can always either find room for it or say I dont have time. I always just say What do you have in mind? It hasnt failed me yet! Sorry, Im busy. Person A: Im fine. If youd rather not, I would love to immediately pretend this never happened and talk about dinosaurs for the next ten minutes, and then never bring it up again. I'd Be Better if You Asked Me out If I Was Any Finer, I'd Be China And we do have fun and hang out occasionally. "I'm not saying I hate you, what I'm saying is that you are literally. Are you busy? I shall think on why. I understand that theyre just trying to be friendly and make small talk but it still feels invasive. At least, it never has for me! That is AMAZING and I love Gladys (and you) and that is going directly into my repertoire for Dealing With Those Extroverts. I feel like letting her sleep is far more important than my social life right now., Sorry, I know it sounds like a stupid excuse. Im working on this myself. I know its a common question and Im sure most people dont mean anything bad by it. 2. All five are initial questions, appropriate for a relatively fast . Not every parent who expects stuff from their kid is unreasonable. I was going to say, my experience with We should hang out some time! and the like are that theyre more of a social gesture. But no one argues against working! My current boss is a total jerk. I like these types are answers because they have the benefits of: 1. always being true, 2. requiring zero thought (e.g. And LW is already handling the situation in the best possible way by giving noncommittal answers. These are my 2 best friends for over 20 years each! I grew up in the Guessiest Guess household ever my mother once quit a job because they said they liked her work so much that theyd like her to do more shifts, and she was angry at being put in the position of having to say no so I didnt come out of childhood equipped with much of a toolbox for saying no assertively. Mother likes to trap me. Funny Responses to "What Are You Doing?" - Mom Advice Line They dont ask if you want to do the thing and then you are able to tell them (and if you were busy, youd probably mention that when declining). And in my experience, parents of adult children dont assign their childrens plans (and wishes) the same priority as their own plans (and wishes). Also: owning that I dont always have to say yes Im getting there! While having to put up with gday, mate lacks the structural oppression of whats aimed at POC, it is still annoying. Its not so much about stopping the question before it comes (pretty much impossible!) Its great that you can come!. Flip the question back on them. If its someone from work that I have no personal relationship with, then Any plans this weekend? just sounds like office small talk, the forward-looking version of How was your weekend? If its someone I know personally, then Are you doing anything tomorrow? sounds like a way to try to trick me into agreeing to do something not-fun (because if it was fun, theyd ask outright). Its mostly me trying to figure out a friends general level of free time and not impose if theyre busy or dealing with a crisis. Another get out the LW could use is, Im still figuring out my plans for that daywas there something you wanted us to do together? and then Yes, thatll work, if you want to do the thing, or Hm, I dont think I can fit that in, if you dontno need to specify that the thing that it wont fit into is a day of sitting around in your pajamas and binge-watching things on Netflix. I ask this question all the time. Thats already happenedshe made a big stink about her dad telling her that they were all going to do something to support me at a time when I was really upset (something that would have taken about an hour of her time). Him: You must be doing something. Try these OOO messages to let people know you're taking a break. Fine, thanks.. I hate it when people tell me whats best for me (more plans! My instinct leads me to: answer back in the affirmative (great) because Performing Happy is expected of us, thank them for their interest (thanks), and repeat the gesture (yourself?). Thursday is good for me.

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